Never having tried yoga, I came into the practice after a paralyzing stroke. This world was new for me and to say I was nervous was an understatement. In my extreme nervousness, I emailed a studio down the street from my house with a barrage of my medical concerns, asking if there was a teacher that would be willing to work with someone with as many issues I had. I was reassured Sarah would be able to meet all of my needs, all I had to do was show up.
I was too nervous for group classes, so accommodations were made to meet Sarah before class, so she could get a closer look at my body to see what I was dealing with. Sarah guided me that morning and told me to come back every Tuesday and Thursday morning before her group class and she would instruct me privately until I was ready to try the group flow. Working with Sarah I had imagined would be much more physically based, since physical therapy was my reason for yoga. I was shocked to see her long thin, perfect yoga body, guide me into modifications of poses kindly without judgment.
“Rachel, yoga is more than a physical practice, people will always be curious about your story, let them look and be curious, just remind yourself your mat is your safe space and let your light shine.”
Her words have shaped my view of yoga, along with my view of myself from that day forward.
It was on my mat I experienced true freedom. Freedom from an anxious and depressed mind, freedom from a body that no longer moved as I wanted, freedom from pain. It didn’t take long to fall in love with the ancient practice. I would later learn of Samadhi one of the limbs of yoga that can be a bit hard to grasp. I came to think of Samadhi as this freedom, present moment awareness and nothing else matters. This is true bliss.
Here are some yoga guides that would be helpful to people with disabilities:
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It only took about 3 weeks of poorly navigating my mat until I was curious about group classes. Having Sarah as an advocate made things easier. I was able to leave my shoes on until arriving to my mat, since I was wearing a clunky AFO inside my shoe still, walking barefoot was not something I was comfortable with. Being told, you have to take your shoes off and leave them at the front instantly created more anxiety. Sarah and the studio owner treated me with such understanding I gained a level of respect I had never experienced before. People stared, some asked harmless questions. Some backed away. All was expected as Sarah had prepared me for the inevitable glares.
I was learning to love myself and respect myself in a way I had never known was possible. You see once I made it to my mat and the class started, I no longer was disabled- it was just a word after all. It didn’t matter if people stared, I know it couldn’t have looked pretty those first few classes stumbling about just to keep the pace of the class. I learned early on resting in child’s pose was okay to do no matter where the rest of the class was, it was like I created my own little world. Cultivating what I later learned was pratyahara or inner awareness, another one of the 8 limbs of yoga. Nothing else mattered. I was fortunate to be in a studio that encouraged the use of any and every prop known to man. Blocks bolsters, straps, blankets, even chairs were available. So, having what I needed was never an issue.
Too many think props are for those that really can’t do yoga. This could not be farther from the truth. Props are a means to an end. A support system in place to make the journey of yoga deeper and more authentic, not to mention more comfortable. Why do we live in a world where asking for help is considered weak? Recognizing and utilizing tools for help is one of the strongest and wisest things humans can do.
Too many think props are for those that really can’t do yoga. This could not be farther from the truth. Props are a means to an end. A support system in place to make the journey of yoga deeper and more authentic, not to mention more comfortable. Why do we live in a world where asking for help is considered weak? Recognizing and utilizing tools for help is one of the strongest and wisest things humans can do.
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There is power in numbers and the more we normalize one handed, one legged modifications the more the world will be forced to see us as yogis and not the just the disabled population.
After a couple years of regular practice Sarah encouraged me to take a teacher training. The world needed to see more instructors like me was her pitch and I was so not interested in being a poster girl for stroke in any way, but I needed to learn more of this beautiful practice, so I signed up and embarked on what would be a life changing journey. I found that people were more accepting than I ever knew. I received a tremendous amount of support from my fellow teacher trainers.
Exposure is everything. I thought to myself was the yoga community failing us or were we failing them. I could no longer fault the yoga community for not being inclusive. It was my job to put myself out there and hiding behind my stroke was the reason there was a lack of awareness, not the other way around. What we are exposed to and have access to matters.
After completing my 200-hour yoga certification I made it a personal mission to teach both able bodies and dis-abled bodies, knowing what we see in physical matter is just one layer. What lies beneath is so much more.
No matter what physical condition your body may be in there is a yoga practice that is right for you. Check out myyogawill.com for more information about Rachel and her stroke and the stroke style yoga she teaches.